It’s been 70 years, really??

What is independence? – the ability to do what you feel is right.

But what is right? – well, you can’t decide it for yourself, it is defined as something which doesn’t seem wrong to others. Take honor killing as an example – choosing your life partner yourself is a sin, it’s a crime but killing isn’t.

I proudly call myself independent – after all I earn my living, I don’t depend on others et cetera et cetera. But last week I had to catch an early morning flight and I was to start at 2 in the morning. All of a sudden, I started feeling unsafe. What if the cab driver…? What if the bus driver…? Or what if some random drunk guy on the road…see I can’t even dare to complete the sentences.

The next day I was asked a question – why did you book an early morning flight in the first place? You’re a girl after all!!!!

I laughed it off, but it gave rise to a question – should we call ourselves independent?

70 years down the line…we’re still struggling, huh?


Anyway, it was not meant to hurt anybody’s feelings. So enjoy your day and thanks for stopping by.

Dear Bestie…

Do you remember the days we used to be best friends?

I bet you do.

Do you remember the promises we made, the decisions we'd taken?

Yeah right, we were innocent.

Remember we decided not to get married ever? Huh, now you're married with two kids.

I remember you wanted to be an air hostess. Now you're a housewife.

To my surprise, I don't remember what I wanted to be. Do you?

You know what! I believe we both wanted to be happy. But are you?

Don't ask me if I'm happy. It's a tricky question. It's neither a yes nor a no.

Why don't we talk nowadays? You said you were busy with kids…really? Or…

Those days were better, weren't they? Not because we shared everything, but because we never ignored each other so we could avoid sharing everything.

I'm sure this letter would not reach you for I don't intend it to.

From,

Your forgotten friend.


 

When She Diaries – Page 4

Have you ever been tired of crying?

Has it ever happened that you woke up in the morning and felt tears welling up inside but you managed to stop them? 

I'm sure it has. Didn't it feel strange? Well, it did to me.

Does that mean you're tired of fighting?

Is it like you've given in?

Or maybe you're used to it now…what is it exactly?

Actually when we're tired of something, we rest, don't we? 

We don't need to hustle all the time; we need rest, the inside voices need to regain their strength before they guide us again, the heart takes some time off before troubling us again and it's okay.

Next time someone tells you that you need to run after your dreams, just tell them that neither the dream nor the road to it is running away, I'll go at my own pace.


 

When she diaries – Page 3

When was the last time I gazed at the stars?

I can’t remember…

There was a time when I’d spend hours staring at the sky, wondering if the cloud was looking like a Dinosaur or a Rabbit. Funny, huh?

Yes life was fun back then. But isn’t it supposed to be fun throughout?

Probably you’d say that the innocence inside us is lost. We’ve grown up. But what does innocence have to do with growing up?

Don’t you still believe in magic…think twice before you say no.

Don’t you still wish for a miracle….

Don’t you still hope that the next morning would bring something good into your life…

Don’t you?

You do, we all do, but we’re afraid of accepting it. Because our innocence has been proved wrong again and again…

Now I’m looking at the sky, but there are no stars. The clouds look neither like a Dinosaur nor like a Rabbit. I guess it’s time to believe in magic again, what say?


 

When she diaries – Page 2

Have you ever realized that you’ve invested half your life into something that is not what you’re made for?

What did you do after that?

Managed to accept the harsh reality? What else could you have done anyway?

Spent days blaming yourself?

Stopped praying to God? Or probably started praying harder to help you get through this.

Started hating life? But life doesn’t give a damn. You know, right?

Realization is either a blessing or a curse. It depends on when you have it. What if it’s too late?

No, not until you’re having it on your deathbed. And what if it’s a blessing in disguise?

I think I’m a hopelessly hopeful person…let’s see.


 

When she diaries

I’m looking for a miracle. Do you know where to find it? 

They say there is no such thing as miracle. if you want something, go get it, fight for it and when you trip get up again. But whom do I fight with? Life? Destiny? Myself?

They say there’s no such thing as destiny. But then who decides how long I should fail before I succeed?

They say failure is essential to success. What is success? when do I call myself successful? Is it when I’m satisfied with my life?

But we are never really satisfied, are we?

As the saying goes – ‘everything will be alright in the end.’ But what really is ‘the end’? How far is it and what happens after that?

I’m not happy, I’m not successful, I’m fighting with each and every tiny little voices inside my head. yet I don’t feel like giving up, not just yet. Is it a miracle?